Humbled. I am constantly humbled

Humbled. I am constantly humbled down into the shavings of…what is lower than nothing? When I hurt someone else, my world shatters. Never enough time goes by between each curse I throw. I must have been a manipulative deciever in another time and place because it’s coming back to haunt me now. I fear explaining. Someone knows what I mean. Someone cries until I do.
I can’t stop being myself!!!