fit to be tied

I can’t get caught up in a net of loose feelings now. I was talking to RT and it seems to me that he is sending some of his loose feelings onto me. He’s very kind and sweet and has been a 100% friend kind of guy for when I’ve let him be near enough… I’m just insecure about allowing him to feel these things. And I don’t really want to bring it up with him because we communicate so poorly most of the time. When it all comes down to it, I’m not interested in anything with him. I must keep it in mind that perhaps he is merely flirting playfully.
All this time I’ve been hoping for someone to pursue me romantically and both times it’s actually happened the two men were not for me, and obviously so. First Jas and now RT. Well RT is more uncertain. I’m sure if he sees this, he’ll say I’m jumping to conclusions and I’ll have injured things somehow. I tend to do that….. I truly did hurt Jas multiple times. Perhaps I’m just holding onto hopes for other things. Perhaps I’m just a normal girl who is sick of giving in. Or perhaps I’m doomed.
dun dun DUN.